haha! i jus stumbled across this interview transcript of simon. got it at claytonaiken forum. now that sugarpie mentioned, wonder if i should register... i was so tempted just now, really. somebody was saying why simon asked vanessa oliveraz and josh gracin to "lose a few pounds" but not to (quote) "obese ruben". ouch! the word obese seems to have a negative connotation. i think ruben's size is working FOR him, makes him cute and cuddly == velvet teddy bear! haha, tha's his trademark... ayway, when i saw this post, i was so tempted to say "apparently because he CAN'T..." really! i said that a long time ago. simon can say that to anybody BUT ruben. anyway, just to share, here's the transcript: Jay: Now Corey Clark is the only one that got pretty close. Could he have made it, had he not.... ? Simon: Not in a million years. [laughs] (some audience boos) Jay: (jokingly to audience) Oh boo, he beat up his sister. Shut up! (audience laughs) Simon: Allegedly. I mean I don't know, but he wouldn't have won. [shakes head] He is gonna leave either this week or next week, so he has an early exit, so what? Jay: How does this work on American Idol, in those terms? If you get arrested, you can't be on? I mean, cos, look at the music industry. Fifty-cent (who?) get shot like 9 times.... like on a Tuesday. So I mean.... Simon: Well, it's a difficult.... I, I don't make the decisions. Umm, but, they are asked to confess these stuff at the beginning. He got away with it, cos on the police record, they spelled his name wrong, that's why he got through. Otherwise he wouldn't have been there. Jay: Oh, okay.... now how about you? Have you ever been arrested? Simon: Yes. Jay: Really? What were you arrested for? Simon: You want me to tell you? [raise eyebrow, and smirk to audience] You really want to know? (audience cheers) Simon: Okay, when I was twelve years old.... I hijacked the bus, with a pea-gun. Jay: A pea-gun? You mean like a water-gun? Simon: It's a gun that fires peas. They go about 6 feet. Jay: Only in England that you would have guns that fires peas. Simon: Yea exactly. It was a toy. Myself and a friend, we're going on the bus, and we thought it'd be a joke to put the gun on the driver's head, and tell him to take us to where we were going..... He believed us. And I remember sitting on the bus thinking, "god this guy is really playing along this well because he didn't stop for 20 miles.".... and we got to the other end, and there were some police cars waiting for us, and they throw us in jail. Jay: Wow. Now how did your parents reacted to this? I mean, you gotta be pretty dumb to hijack a bus. [left hand in gun gesture, mocking: "Take us to America!"] (all laughs) Simon: Well, I realized we are going to be in trouble. Because they brought down, umm you know, Scotland yard. (me: where? ok now I could have heard that wrong.) Where do the 12-year old get the guns? And these guys walked into the cell where we were sitting, and they said, "Where did you get the gun?" .... And I said to them, "They are pea-guns." ... [mocking jailmate reaction: yea right!].... so my mum turns up with my dad, and she had me pick stones in the farm for a week as a punishment. Jay: Picking up stones at the farm for a week? Well that's not too bad. Simon: If the producers have found out, I wouldn't be a judge on American Idol. So there you go. (audience laughs) Jay: Well, let me ask you about last Tuesday. You appeared to be especially cranky. Were you in a bad mood last Tuesday? Simon: Umm, well you know, for me it's different than the other 2 judges, because there are a lot of that afterwards. You know, it's..... it's a serious thing. The winner, I got to invest 3 million dollars (me: bullshit!) of my money into the record label, and I just thought they weren't very good..... .... So I told them. Jay: When was disco night, was this the other night? Simon: That was this week... Jay: This Tuesday? Simon: Yea....and the week before was even worse, we did country rock. What do I know about country rock. Jay: So you don't like country? Simon: I hate it. (audience cheers) Simon: No, I do. I loathe it. .... and the first guy comes out in a cowboy shirt and a cowboy hat and sings this song. He might as well be singing Lithuianian Opera for all I know. I mean, it was just ... (hand gesture signaling "way over my head") ... whoosh. Terrible. Jay: We put a little tape together.... some of the bitchier moments. [-------- AI footage begins --------] Simon:- I saw someone who should have been performing at a children's party. (about Rickey) I just thought, 6 and a half out of 10. Whoopeee. (about KimberlyME) Within the context of this competition, I thought that was terrible. (about Clay) You can't compare that to Whitney or Chaka Khan, it was alright.... (about Trenyce) I'm being honest, Josh. If you would have sang like that when we first saw you, you wouldn't have gotten through the first round. It was absolutely dreadful. (about Josh) [-------- AI footage ends --------] Simon: [slaps own hand] Naughty Simon..... But you know what, I thought they were terrible. And you know, at the end of the day, they're lucky to be in this competition because whoever wins is gonna be a multi-millionaire, and never have to work again. If they can't take a few insults, get off. (audience cheers, Simon takes a sip of who-knows-what from the cup provided by the show.) Jay: When you go out in the public, how do people regard you. Do they love you, do they hate you.... Simon: They're in awe. Jay: They're in awe? Shock and awe? Simon: Just awe. Jay: Do they expect you to be rude to them..... do they come to you and go, "Simon, insult me." Do you get that? Simon: They ask to insult them. And then when I do, they cry. (audience laughs) Simon: No, I'm serious. One girl actually begged me to insult her. But when I told her, her hair was appalling, she burst into tears. So I ask, "So why did you ask me to insult you then?" (me: who is this moron?) (laughs) Jay: Now you're doing a kid's version? Simon: I'm not. Jay: They are doing a kid's version of American Idol. Simon: Yes. Jay: You don't want to be involved in that? Simon: No. Jay: You don't like humiliating a child? That's right up your alley. Simon: I love to. [big smile] LOVE TO! I mean... I'm sure it would do really well, the idea of me having to sit through kids tempeting to sing. I'd rather listen to fingers going down the blackboard. But that's just me. I don't think they could sing under the age of 16. And umm, I'd put a government health warning on it. Jay: Really? Simon: I would, just like cigarettes. Anyone under the age of 16 shouldn't be allowed to sing. (me: WTF?) Jay: Really? wow. Simon: Truthfully. Yea, truthfully. Jay: (points into audience and said to Simon) ... Somebody's hissing. Simon: (talks to audience) But they can't, can they? Jay: Are you looking forward to this Justin & Kelly movie? Do you know about this movie? Simon: [smirk] Well, I got a bit confused when I heard the title... it sounded a bit like an Ed Wood Transvestite movie. It's called From Justin to Kelly. [laughs] ... and I was thinking, okay, where are you going with this? Um, but I've already seen a few bits and pieces, it's gonne be fun... I mean.... [very smug] well you know.... (me: BWAHAHAHAHA!) Jay: It would be fun. Simon: Yea. [still very smug; and holding both thumbs up.] Two thumbs up! (me: oh I bet he's dying inside. HAHA!) Jay: So, who's gonna win this year? Are you allowed to say? Can you pick a favorite.... who do you like so far? Simon: Well, if I was going on Tuesday's show, I would have to say Ruben. (audience cheers, some boos) Simon: (looks at audience) But if I also say Clay, you're also gonna cheer. (audience cheers and boos) Simon: .... only not so much. (ouch! poor Clay) Jay: So Ruben is your choice? Simon: Um, yeah. I mean, it changes from week to week, Jay. But I thought based on what I saw last Tuesday... I mean, you know.... Clay - great singer, Ruben - great singer.... one is a pop star. Jay: Okay, you got it. Thanks Simon. [shakes Simon's hand, then looks at audience/camera.] i love simon. don't you just? posted by Yee 5:24 PM . . .
i love simon. don't you just?
