十年前后 - 李克勤

后悔去爱着他 自己掌掴吧
明知喜欢清水 竟去转喝绿茶
望见他的创疤我仍未怕
感觉像得到天下
像只井底之蛙要离开最美初夏
发现到冬天气候更差

十年前彼此不够迁就
十年后只会做好朋友
是我关键时候
不珍惜你 眼白白让你走
爱情甜酸苦得我自己感受
照亮长夜最后只有白昼
不必强求 谁救我不如自救

就算奏过受难曲
也死得冥目
童话似的恋爱
竟也可怕结局
是我不知好歹没留住你
今天你心有所属
若再死心不息最后只有万劫不复
看着你开心我便满足

十年前彼此不够迁就
十年后只会做好朋友
是我关键时候
不珍惜你 眼白白让你走
爱情甜酸苦得我自己感受
照亮长夜最后只有白昼
不必强求 谁会妄想望天可打救

我自行内咎 愿你走
事实上当初分错了手
怎么配做你的诚实膊头

十年前即使拼命迁就
十年后相信亦会分手
任哪一段时候 不可拥有
永远最美丽最优秀
爱情甜酸苦得我自己感受
照亮长夜最后只有白昼
不必强求谁救我不用自救

posted by Yee 2:27 PM

. . .

i just feel like writing today.
boss gave me a day off today, told me to just rest through the weekend and start work again next week. i'm not sure why EXACTLY, but i am quite sure it's because he is on leave today and he is afraid that i am going to be looking for him since i'm working on the stuff. ha. initially i had no plans to stay at home today since i have so much work to do, and i am probably not going to work much at home. sugarpie asked me if the work i don't do today will have any repurcussions, whether i will then have to work through the weekend. it won't, at least not that soon. whatever i don't do today, i can do some other day. but i am not a person who likes my work to snowball. i am potentially a workaholic, despite my constant griping about the importance of a balance between work and life which seems to be lost in this society. whatever i don't do today, i am going to have to do another day, on top of the work i have to do on that day. but since i didn't do it today, the time today is lost, and i won't be able to have it back. so work snowballs, time diminishes. what's the point? where does the improvement in life quality go? can i actually feel it? i probably barely feel any improvement, but when the day comes that i need to do what i didn't do today, i would be kicking myself and regretting it. i don't like to regret things i did or didn't do. i have enough of that without consciously creating more issues.

but i still took the day off by not going to school today. doesn't mean i'm not working at all, i'm just working from home and saving on transport time and money and effort. i have to admit i'm not working much though. but i still am. come to think of it, i probably wouldn't be working much even if i were to go to school today. and today is a good day to stay at home bcs of the weather. it's been cool all day, threatening to rain but i'm safely tucked away in the comfort of my home. when i woke up in the morning i had no idea i would be staying home today. i turned off the alarm once it rang and dragged my ass out of bed without delaying any time. i ate and showered and all, but as i was drying myself (still on time up to here), it occured to me that it would be quite stupid to go to school today. boss already gave me the day off, so he's not going to see the effort i put in. i'm not feeling too well (still some discomfort though nothing major), sugarpie is on MC and not going to work either, and the work i want to do today can also be done at home (it's enough, considering that i don't work much at home ANYWAY). it's the perfect day to stay home, what better time to? it seemed the most rational and right thing to do, so i made a conscious decision to stay home. see, i don't stay home out of laziness, i actually consider and then decide with rational reasoning. although this reasoning may not hold for others, this i am still aware of.

up to now i haven't been able to get much work done. everything distracts me, and i'm not even talking about tv. i was packing, cleaning, organizing, eating, drinking, rotting, reading, everything but working. hehe. but i managed to figure out how to run LVQ using the toolbox. not too bad lah, still got SOMETHING done. hee.

listening to hacken cd 1 now. the songs are all quite nice. there are some that are not my type, but i am very forgiving. after all, it is not advisable for an artiste to stick too closely to one style. you need to diversify and reach out to as many market segments as you can. it's just more commercially sensible to do so. i can skip those songs i don't fancy, since there are so many more that suit me. =)

i should get back to work. there are lots to do, and later on i intend to rot in front of the tv. there is just so much to watch! backlog ah backlog...

posted by Yee 2:09 PM

. . .

i'm truly not someone who can blog. i can't do it regularly. i would think that a large motivation to blogging is to 'answer' to your audience. people blog when they know there are people reading. they will write something even if they are extremely tired (or have no good material), as long as they know somebody may be reading it. maybe there are some who blog as a diary and just want to record down what happened in the day.

i just can't.

it's this mentality that i don't want to tell too much to anyone. i don't want people to be able to read into my thoughts. i don't want to leave an obvious trail as to what i did or where i went in the day or week. i can't even bring myself to write down anyone's real name on this page that no one reads. obviously i'm not going to post any photos of people here. the weird thing is that i don't think i even want to post ANY photos here. i don't want any information to fall into the wrong hands and be used against me or my family or my friends. think i'm paranoid? then brace yourself for what's coming next. on the other hand i wonder if blogging could come in handy if i suddenly disappear one day and my life turns into a CSI worthy event. what would the investigators see? nowhere to start on. no doubt there are certain routines and habits of mine to start on, after all no one is entirely random and whimsical, but i don't keep a clear obvious track of my daily life. the records i keep are barely understandable to others since i tend to 'encrypt' them.

what is wrong with me?

posted by Yee 2:01 PM

. . .